The Clean and Green Club, October 2023

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Shel Horowitz’s Clean and Green Marketing Tip: October 2023

Products that Should Have Been
Photo Credit: Fauxels via Pexels 
One cool way to get the juices flowing AND have quite a bit of fun is to make stuff up and then write promotional material for it. The first time I remember doing this was in 1978 or 1979, when I worked as a manuscript reader for a New York City literary agency. A particularly bad manuscript led to this poem (copyright 1979 by Shel Horowitz, all rights reserved):

Advertisement (Melodramamine)
And now, from the makers of Dramamine, for motion sickness…
an exciting new product,
Melodramamine, for EMOTION sickness.
Yes, this special formula will overcome that nasty, nauseous feeling
from indulgence in overwritten books.
Let Melodramamine return YOU to the world of literary enjoyment.
Use only as directed.

My 2000 book Grassroots Marketing: Getting Noticed in a Noisy World had a few examples, too. One was a series of six radio commercials for a fictitious Armenian grocery: five illustrating how the same business could target different market segments on different shows—and one demonstrating how they could get too clever and forget that the purpose of an ad is to get people to buy (that one involved singing apricots and the arrest of their importer). While Grassroots Marketing is officially out of print, I still have copies for sale, with the price reduced all the way from the original $22.95 down to just $10 before shipping for the paperback, $10 and no shipping cost for the PDF ebook. (And while you’re on my shopping cart, why not pick up a copy of my latest book, Guerrilla Marketing to Heal the World? It’s all about building environmental and social good into profitable products, services, and mindsets. You’ll save on shipping costs by getting both at the same time.)

And sometimes, I make up products without writing copy for them. Anyone who wants to start a Chicagoland heavy metal festival called Illinoise or a nonsmoking vegan casino in (guess what city) called Las Vegans—you have my blessing. My daughter enjoys this kind of game too. Years ago, she came up with L’Auberge d’Aubergine, which translates as The Eggplant Inn. So, besides a few laughs, what do you get from doing this sort of exercise?

Most of all, you get a creativity jumpstart. It gets your brain thinking in different ways. You think about what’s missing in the marketplace and what niche you night fill (not with your imaginary product but with a real product that you imagine and then create)—and you think about what makes a good name for a product, service, company, or even an idea, which is a very good skill to have. I actually have a section of Grassroots Marketing covering eight factors to consider in choosing a name. And for those doing social change and planetary healing, it’s a way of expanding what’s possible. Conceiving of something can be a first step to achieving it. For every invention that happened through serendipity, a lot more showed up by doing the work.

Of course, if you’re in the market for a new business name and would rather not do it yourself, drop me a line. While I’m not a professional naming consultant (and I don’t charge like one either), I have named a fair number of things over the years.

Discover why Chicken Soup’s Jack Canfield, futurist Seth Godin, and many others recommend Shel’s 10th book, Guerrilla Marketing to Heal the World (and download a free sampler). Autographed and inscribed copies available.
View highlights from (and listen to) more than 30 podcasts ranging from 5 minutes to a full hour. Click here to see descriptions and replay links.

The Sustainability Scorecard: How to Implement and Profit from Unexpected Solutions

The Sustainability Scorecard: How to Implement and Profit from Unexpected Solutions
by Urvashi Bhatnagar and Paul Anastas (Chelsea Green, 2022)

Yes, another book brimming with examples of companies that re-imagined and then reinvented, piloting initiatives that if widely copied would go a long way toward greening the planet. I’ve reviewed plenty of those, and this will not be the last one, I’m sure. A few things make this one different:

  • Anastas’ expertise in green chemistry
  • A data-driven, quantifiable scorecard that companies can use or adopt to drive innovation, working on the principle that before you improve something, you have to measure it
  • Emphasis on large corporations
  • A proposed shift in the sustainability conversations at those corporations—from risk management to strategic opportunity (first introduced on page 14 and a theme throughout the book): “We can achieve superior performance, convenience, efficiency, and profitability not in spite of a focus on sustainability but because of it” (p. 28)

In my consulting, I personally don’t generally begin with the data, preferring to start with the vision and then figure out how the engineers can get us there—but I don’t think either approach precludes the other. And while I run a one-person business and don’t ever expect to be an employee of a huge corporation, I still found significant utility in this book. The writing is clear, and the data-driven outcomes are impressive. Small businesses and solopreneurs have to think differently about implementation, but can still draw many useful lessons.

Bhatnagar and Anastas design their whole-lifecycle scorecard around four principles: waste prevention, maximizing efficiency and performance, supply chain renewability, and safe degradation at the end of a product’s lifecycle—and measure three categories of impact: environmental, employee, and community (p. 16). One key takeaway is to design safety and end-of-life considerations in from the beginning—preferably by turning waste into monetizable inputs for other products (pp. 48-50, 81-83).


As a marketer, I find it odd that their scorecard aims for the lowest possible score: a zero in each metric. I would have designed it to give points for good initiatives so that a higher score provides companies with a clear and obvious marketing benefit. But even though it gives the book its name, the instrument is only a small portion of the content.


Much of the rest is examples of companies jumpstarting eco-friendly and socially just innovation. To list a few among many: design electronic chips WITHOUT generating 600 times the product weight in waste (p. 63); sequester not just whatever carbon you create but some of the backlog (p. 65); lower not just carbon footprint but water footprint (pp. 73-74); eliminate toxic chemical flame retardants by switching to non-flammable materials (p. 80); extract and recycle the water in human waste while turning urine into electricity (pp. 116, 118); replace forever chemicals including poisonous plasticizers such as phthalates with safe, degradable alternatives (p. 133) and chemical insecticides with yeast-grown non-toxic ones (p. 144); change pharmaceutical packaging so extra doses can be used instead of thrown away (p. 136); eliminate hunger by approaching food waste differently (pp. 147-149); extract and reuse materials like nickel and cobalt from used batteries (pp. 151-152); fund more expensive green and social justice initiatives through the savings in health care costs (p. 174)…


A few organizations get extended case studies, some including their full scorecards:

  • Electronics giant Philips (pp. 106-112; 191-197) already generates 70 percent of revenue from green products and services and is aiming for 100 percent.
  • Hospital system Gunderson Health (pp. 159-161) parlayed a $2MM investment into annual savings of $1.2MM—that’s an astounding 60 percent annual ROI— including slashing the cost of managing pharmaceutical waste from $151,000 to less than $10,000 per year.
  • Janitorial products company Coastwide Laboratories (pp. 161-170; 177-185) re-engineered its product line to combine functions in fewer products, marketed its private-label solutions to some of the largest manufacturers in the country, and brought distribution in-house, allowing them to market honestly as the lowest cost solution even while increasing the product price (because the customer only needed one product to replace two or more).
  • P2Science, maker of eco-friendly silicones for cosmetics and hair products, boosted yield to 95 percent while simplifying the production process.

The book is also full of sets of principles and steps that would be useful to companies of any size. And it has a terrific index, which I wish more publishers would model.

Connect with Shel

Turn Your Sustainability/CSR Report Into Powerful Marketing!  http://goingbeyondsustainability.com/turn-that-nobody-reads-it-csr-report-into-a-marketing-win/

About Shel

Speaker, author, and consultant Shel Horowitz of GoingBeyondSustainabiity.com helps businesses find the sweet spot at the intersections of profitability with environmental and social good — creating and marketing profitable products and services that make a direct difference on problems like hunger, poverty, war, and catastrophic climate change. His 10th book is Guerrilla Marketing to Heal the World.

If you’re not already a subscriber, please visit http://goingbeyondsustainability.com and scroll to the very bottom left corner. You’ll find lots of interesting information on your way to the subscription form, too.

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